As some of you may have guessed, I'm no longer employed at what I once described as "a really cool environmental non-profit."The best part of my one-on-one conversation with the executive director of the aforementioned really cool environmental non-profit last Friday was when she told me I am "tedious" to work with. That's a new one for me. And, as stunning and hurtful as it is, I'm getting a helluva lot of mileage out of that one.
Today, I learned through my friend Adriana's blog, that butternut squash and I have something in common--we're tedious.
Last night, a friend of mine on the West Coast, upon learning I'd been laid off, offered me some freelance editing work. The subject is tobacco research and she described the work as "time consuming and tedious." I emailed her right back and said her work would be a "perfect fit for me, since I'm tedious."
I'm thinking of going on the road and doing standup comedy as I'm job searching, but my fear is, the audience will find me tedious and then I'll never get a job again.
Most people get downsized, laid off, shit canned, whatever, for being redundant or incompetent or an asshole. I get the shaft for being tedious.
Future potential paycheck writer: So, why did you leave your last job?
Future potential paycheck receiver (a.k.a. me): I was tedious.
FPPW: Ah... Right...
Where one person sees "tedious," another sees "detail-oriented" or "inquisitive" or "open to learning." But I suppose that can be tedious, too, especially if you have a tendency to be disorganized and ineffective when it comes to utilizing all of the resources available to you, including your staff.
But I'm not bitter.
That would be tedious.
I'm a butternut squash! I'm a butternut squash! I'm a butternut squash! Naa-naa-na-naa-naa!
Photo courtesy of http://www.ourhutch.com/samples/vegetables/butternut.jpg
10 comments:
Let me be the first to offer my condolences on being laid off.
This sucks.
I hope they're at least giving you a big fat settlement check to soften the blow....
p.s. I like butternut squash.
Tedious never got so much lovin'...it must be wondering what's going on in the world to get so much attention.
What *I* find tedious is your wretch of a former boss and her passive-aggressive, and even worse, her outright idiotic way of running a business. Oh wait - wasn't she the one who called it a family? Ahhh, rightrightrightrightright...
I believe in this case, the schadenfreude is better savored in thinking about how WFB (wretched former boss) will be way up shit creek after she scapegoated and shitcanned our Janet. THAT I will enjoy.
Janet, dear, do keep us posted so we can all warm our hands by that fire...
You still turn me on.
Btw, I'm assuming your west coast friend w/ the tobacco research would be Janet B? How is she?? I have emailed them a few times, but no response. I'm wondering if I have the wrong email address.*
*(Because there isn't even a remote possibility that someone doesn't totally dig me like crazy and want to hear from me, like, ALL the time.)
Butternut squash and thyme are a nice pairing. Let's hope the same combo works in your favor.
I'm with Di: anxious to hear how WFB will fare doing her job AND your job. Mwah ha ha ha ha!
I tried to read through this post but found it so ... Actually, there are much worse things than being a butternut squash.
Tedious to work with? Tedious?!? What a bizarre thing to tell someone!
I'm so sorry about the lay-off, yet I cannot think but that there is a great, great job out there with your name on it.
Man, DC sucks so much of the time. Can we introduce your old boss and my old boss? I think they deserve each other.
I will be thinking exceptionally good thoughts for you on your job search. Tedious, my ass!
BD: I like butternut squash, too. As for settlement, they did not. There are some other legalities that I won't go into in this public forum that may eventually have to be ironed out, too. Stay tuned.
Adriana: I try to be versatile, like butternut squash, but maybe I need to lighten up a bit more and not be so insistent on expecting guidance when I'm given jobs for which I have few qualifications and third party training.
As for Tom Delay being out of a job, I have two words: Woo hoo!
JaneAnnechovy: Always the Grammar Gal! It was great seeing you and David last week. Thanks for all the hugs and support. P.S. Leif is an absolute DOLL! He stole my heart. P.P.S. What is it with you and serious guys?
Di & Scott: You have been amazing through all of this. Your advice has been invaluable and it's about to be put to good use. Stay tuned...
Tickle the Pear: You still turn me on, too, darling! Lucky, lucky Generic Mohammed is all I have to say!
ME: I'll have to try the squash and herb pairing you suggest, oh vegetarian cooking guru, you. As for WFB--I'm waiting in the wings to see what happens.
Dale: Sorry you found the post, well, you know... tedious. The only thing worse than being butternut squash that I can think of is either being a poop or being dead. Both seem pretty awful to me.
Merujo: Thanks for your kind words. After your last work experience, I'm humbled you would include me among those who have been mistreated. Between you, me, and my friend Di of Di & Scott, I think we've had enough sucky work experiences to renounce employment all together and start our own gig. Come to think of it, I think Adriana and ME have had pretty awful experiences, too. What it is with women and bad work experiences? Do men have them, too? Hmmmmm... There's something to write about....
P.S. All: Lest you forget: I'm a butternut squash...
Do you think WFB confused "tedious" with "tenacious"?!
Verniciousknids: I adore you! Thank you for that.
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